I find myself in a difficult situation. I finished my undergrad, and rather than going home to the safety of mom and dad, have decided to stay out on my own. I know that more often than not, most undergrad students return home immediately after finishing their degrees, but for me, it’s just not possible.
I love my parents and my home town (enough to write a post about it even…) but mentally, I just couldn’t do it. I felt like going home would be like taking three steps backwards, reversing any kind of personal progress I’ve made in the last four years. This is because I still need to learn how to maintain a level of control, while in the comfort and safety of others.
There is nothing wrong with going home. I know several friends who have done it: for financial reasons, for lack of an attachment to their University town, or because they simple desired to. I don’t think there is anything wrong with returning home to live with your parents after finishing your degree, as long as you’re still in control of your life.
Maintaining your control at home
When moving back home, lines of communication must be made, boundaries set, and freedoms established. It might be easy to just jump right back into the life you had in high school, but for your own sake, try and avoid this. You aren’t the same person you were back then, you’ve grown, you’ve experienced, and you’ve changed. Celebrate these accomplishments by continuing on your path, with the reigns grasped firmly.
Accept the fear, and all that comes along with it
If you have decided to stay out, congratulations! Welcome to one of the scariest experiences of your life. There is no comfort of returning to school, no mandatory routines set for you, or even constant human interaction. It’s all up to you to keep up your life and keep trudging towards your dreams. But that’s what’s great.
You have the authority to do whatever you want/need to do in order to achieve your goals. The flip side to that is you also have a responsibility to yourself to uphold as well. Make sure you stay focused in this tumultuous time, when you’re riddled with anxiety and fear. Have the courage to put yourself first, and maintain a good balance in all areas of life. Call your mom often, don’t cancel on your friends and remember: pancakes for dinner are always a good idea.